Harder than I thought

Turns out that this not yelling thing is a LOT harder than I thought. The reason the first day was as easy as it was was because I didn't have anything going on. Just a Saturday, no commitments, not even a husband. Then there was Sunday and church followed by outings on Monday and today. And don't get me started on being distracted! I think that that so far has been my number one problem. I get so distracted and am not giving my children the attention that they need. And then get impatient that what I am trying to do gets interrupted and they get louder or more clingy.
 But I can't focus on them every time they talk or need me. I have to cook or drive or SHOWER for crying out loud. Plus there is the need to take care of myself for sanity's sake let alone for their well being. If I am happy and sane then they not only survive but thrive because I have a cup to give from. So sometimes that means talking on the phone with an adult or reading a book. I think it is important to establish a balance and an understanding. Explaining beforehand that 'Mommy is busy or taking care of something important and that I will get to you after'. As long as this doesn't happen ALL the time and I do in fact get back then hopefully they will understand. It is important for children to understand they are not the center of the universe. Plus it shows that we each take care of ourselves.

I would also like to not just focus on the negative. There have been some noticeable changes. Bud listens a lot better. I'm not saying he listens every time or that there aren't tantrums, he is 3, but he is  getting better! It might be from a lack of yelling or because of the not yelling I am trying to be more present and give him the attention in the moment or maybe it is from playing more because I am in the moment and giving him attention. Either way, it feels like a win-win-win.